FROM THE ASSESSOR, Jim Manske

I am very grateful to have shared this journey with Tomomi! Among 10,000 other things, I appreciate how Tomomi has been the glue helping to sustain our growing Japanese-speaking pod. Each month she connects with pod members and me to determine what topic we will explore. This contributes to support, ease, and community.

I’m also appreciative of Tomomi’s connection skills. I notice here “living” and “being” Nonviolent Communication in our interactions. A special highlight in our journey together was sharing the 2023 Bali IIT where Tomomi fully participated and helped to create ongoing community by creating WhatsApp groups for existing candidates as well as potential candidates.

I appreciate Tomomi’s hunger for feedback and responsiveness to it. An important part of the pre-assessment process for me is to notice how candidates seek and integrate the feedback they receive from their community, the trainers they work with, and me. I also enjoy how Tomomi’s self-reflection seems to deeply support her ongoing integration. When we connected via zoom during our pre-assessment events, Tomomi often arrived with questions to explore, celebrations of recent integration, and I noticed her taking notes vigorously. She always seemed to arrive prepared to use our time effectively and wisely, and also seemed open to outcome when appointments would be rescheduled.

I also appreciate how Tomomi took complete responsibility for arranging interpretation for any of the events she offered in Japanese, as well as her support for Yukari, recently certified from Japan. Tomomi also helped me with translation of important communication between the Japanese speakers and me. I could go on and on! I look forward to Tomomi’s contribution to our network in Japan, Australia and beyond!

From Tomomi:

I encountered NVC through a friend in 2017. The first time I realized that I had connected with a need, I asked my friend, "What did you just do?!" because the entire situation and anything the other person said and/or did became irrelevant, and I found myself in a different world. Ever since then, I have been fascinated by NVC and what this tool can do for my life and for others around me.

The certification process I went through is a gift made possible thanks to many colleagues, NVC practitioners, and CNVC Certified Trainers, including Japanese Pod members, mentors, and my assessor, Jim Manske.

I am grateful for the numerous individuals who have generously shared what they have learned, serving as inspiring frontiers. Witnessing their serious commitment to nonviolence has inspired me many times over. I particularly enjoyed the friendship we have cherished and cultivated together through Pod activities and the Bali IIT, which nourish me tremendously.

I am a baby giraffe just starting to walk with my head up, and having a community where I can fall and keep getting up with courage and compassion is very encouraging and empowering for me to keep walking this path. I am looking forward to deepening my learning and working with all of you, both locally and globally.

FROM THE ASSESSOR, Sylvia Haskvitz

I first met Achun in 2019 while offering workshops in Beijing. She and Summer Xi organized several workshops during the time of my visit. I was impressed that after a full day of learning, Achun met with the participants for another couple of hours to reinforce the learning and support what had happened earlier in the day. I found her eager to learn, to heal, to explore — to take in feedback and respond when she was in agreement and when it didn’t land for her.

She has regularly participated in Spiritual Sundays, candidates calls and has brought her insights and care during these sessions. She has taken the materials I shared connecting NVC and our body and food and organized and facilitated workshops baed on her learning in a way that I was impressed and inspired by.

Achun is the first candidate I worked with whose language I do not share. So, the work was through translation, intuition and a felt sense of her and lots of Deepl translation. I was amazed at the connection even though our languages are different. I am confident Achun will continue to learn and grow and bring her humor, lightness and sense of fun to the greater CNVC community.

From Duan:

My name is Achun, I come from China. I love food, travel and art. I love nature. Ten years ago, I left my job due to illness. When I was lost and helpless from the original life track, I met NVC. In particular, during the five-day workshop of CNVC trainer Younjeong Lee in June 2015, I was deeply nourished, and experienced the warmth, depth and sense of power that NVC brought me.

From then on, my life began a new chapter.In the last 10 years, I have attended numerous NVC classes and workshops, and with the support of my evaluators and friends in the community, I have transformed some of my judgments about myself, slowly reconciled with my past, made great breakthroughs in making requests, developed closer relationships with loved ones, and lived with more compassion and kindness for myself and others.

Since October 2016, I've been sharing NVC and enjoying it. In 2018, after making my own treasured choices, I began my certification journey, I registered my candidacy with Jim Manske in 2018 and I am forever grateful to him for the guidance and example he gave  me. Sylvia will be my new appraiser in 2021. I was honored to have the support and love of two appraisers. I see more and more people because of my sharing, their lives more vivid and blooming, I experience a new meaning and value of life!

I thank Sylvia Haskvitz for her warm love, embrace, and guidance. In my time working with Sylvia, I have experienced power sharing, honesty, trust and respect, and I am grateful to Jim Manske and Jori Manske for teaching and helping me; Thanks to Summer for her encouragement, support, and help. 

Thanks to my daughter and family for giving me many opportunities to practice and reflect; Thank you for the support and companionship of every trainer and community partner I met during my learning and growth. Becoming a CNVC Certified trainer is a new start, I look forward to bringing NVC to more women in a fun, light-hearted and humorous way. I will continue to explore "Food and the body's NVC."  I'll do more conflict mediation.

FROM THE ASSESSOR, Gina Lawrie

I have been working with Andreas through his certification journey since 2017. He is from Germany and chose to do his certification in English because that is the language in which he works.  He founded his own international IT company and has not only introduced NVC there but embedded it into the culture. It has been a joy to accompany Andreas and see the growth of his groundedness as he has integrated NVC more and more into his being.

He is committed to sharing his organisational experience with others, both within the NVC community and beyond and I really look forward to seeing that. In addition to this Andreas offers NVC training with his wife to teaching assistants in the school that his son attends and I celebrate his commitment to that. There is an energetic quality to the way Andreas expresses from his heart and receives others that moves me and I interpret it coming from the depth of his connection with himself and his spiritual being.  I am delighted to recommend him to become a Certified Trainer. 

From Andreas:

My journey with Nonviolent Communication has been a profound personal transformation, a path towards living a life less dictated by fears and social conditioning but driven by the freedom and fullness of my heart. This journey began in 2014 during a challenging phase in my professional life, which led me to discover NVC as a vital source of growth in my life.

Initially, embracing the spirit and principles of NVC was my strategy to navigate this challenging period. Experiencing the power of Marshall Rosenberg's work, I started to integrate it into all parts of my life: in my business context, inspiring my family, in my children’s school, and in school-related organizations focused on inclusion.

In 2018, I embarked on the path to NVC certification, with Gina Lawrie supporting my journey as my assessor. This endeavor went beyond the pursuit of a certificate; it represented a commitment to cultivating a consistent rhythm in my NVC practice. It was an opportunity to deepen my understanding and embrace spirituality, enhancing my consciousness and compassionate presence both within myself and in my interactions with others. Moreover, this process was instrumental in forging meaningful connections with like-minded individuals across the global NVC community.

I am sincerely grateful for my teachers and mentors, especially Klaus Karstädt, Robert Gonzales, Robert Krzisnik, and my dear mentor and assessor Gina Lawrie, along with the many inspiring colleagues and friends I've encountered along the way. One of the most impactful applications of NVC for me has been within my own company, a technology and consultancy business. By integrating NVC principles, we've invited colleagues to learn, experience, and collaboratively cultivate a life-serving business culture rooted in NVC values.

 This initiative extends beyond transforming our company; it's about enriching the broader NVC community and fostering a network of corporations and organizations committed to integrating NVC, thereby building life-enriching organizations. This journey to becoming CNVC certified is more than just personal growth; it's about embodying and sharing the principles of NVC to inspire change in various facets of life, particularly in organizational structures.

Inspired by Marshall Rosenberg's perspective, I see my role not just in alleviating personal distress in conflict situations but in actively using NVC to transform systems and contribute to the creation of more empathic, life-serving, and collaborative societies. As I stand on the threshold of becoming CNVC certified, I am eager to continue this journey, sharing the transformative power of NVC and fostering environments where empathy and compassion lead to a life with more joy, understanding, peace, and systemic change.

FROM THE ASSESSOR, Stephanie Bachmann Mattei

It is with incredible joy that I announce that Mary Goyer from California USA has completed the certification journey and is now finally joining our community of Certified Trainers. Mary's journey was incredibly rich even before starting the official certification journey. That is why I put the "finally" in the previous sentence! For years she worked with BayNVC and Mary has been part of the trainers of NVC Santa Cruz for years.

In addition, Mary edited the book, "The Healing Power of Empathy: True Stories About Transforming Relationships" (published by PuddleDancer Press)

As the community of candidates gathered together with me, one other Assessor (Susanna Warren), one Assessor in training (Susan Jennings) two CTs from the USA (Tricia Martin and Beth Morgan) and the incredible gift of Kanya Likanasudh from Thailand, we all savored the humor, story telling capacity and depth of inquiry that Mary brings to the practice. I know many of us rejoice to see Mary's presence and skill officially recognized by CNVC.

From Mary:

The main thing that stood out to me when I first encountered NVC, the warmth of the community, has been a constant throughout my learning and certification journey. It really is the people that have had the most obvious impact on my process. Various mentors, of which there are many - including my assessor, Stephanie - have demonstrated several things in common, in my opinion, including an eagerness to help, a deep commitment to embodying the integrity of NVC consciousness, but also a quality of humility around being a human, possessing both strengths and challenges.

It’s been inspiring to track my own progress in the context of this type of support, in which I felt seen for my own gifts and contributions and simultaneously honored and held in my own humanity - even while getting sick, taking breaks, having ups and downs, etc. I’m certainly excited to continue offering myself in service of connection moving forward, but I’m also glad to do so in the company of this community of others who share so many of my values.

I want to send a special thanks to some of the folks whose work and friendship have shaped me so much: Kristin, Christine, Jean, Miki, Kathy, Roxy, and to the originals, Tim and Katherine.

FROM THE ASSESSOR, Marcelle Bélanger

[EN] I am pleased to recommend Louise to join the community of certified trainers. Its integration shows us its ability to share the process with integrity and enthusiasm! I appreciate so much her natural talent for listening and creating a sense of welcome and security. I celebrate her growing journey to assert herself and dare to express her Truth!

Also, I want to celebrate her impact as part of her work team at Laval University! She knew how to “contaminate” her entire team and convey to them the profound meaning of the NVC. She is very committed, and she embodies this way of life! In the final part of her journey, I was accompanied by co-evaluators Gina Cenciose and Valérie Lanctôt-Bédard, who are also celebrating Louise’s certification.

[FR] Je suis heureuse de recommander Louise pour rejoindre la communauté des formateurs certifiés. Son intégration, nous démontre sa capacité à partager le processus avec intégrité et enthousiasme! J’apprécie tellement son talent naturel d’écoute et de créer un sentiment d’accueil et de sécurité. Je célèbre son cheminement grandissant à s’affirmer et oser exprimer sa vérité !

Aussi, je veux célébrer son impact au sein de son équipe de travail à l’université Laval! Elle a su « contaminer » l’ensemble de son équipe et de leur transmettre le sens profond de la CNV. Elle est très engagée et elle incarne cet art de vivre ! Dans la dernière partie de son parcours, j’étais accompagnée des co-évaluatrices Gina Cenciose et Valérie Lanctot-Bédard qui célèbrent également la certification de Louise.

From Louise:

[EN]  Contributing to the world by striving to bring understanding, respect, and peace that I wish to live and touch the living to taste the intensity found within it, these are the aspirations that revealed themselves to me during my encounter with Nonviolent Communication (NVC) and learning its practice. Bringing meaning and alignment into the different spheres of my life, it is indeed both as a mother and a manager, but also as a partner, sister, and friend that I experience the impact of engaging with the living within oneself through self-empathy to better connect with others from a place of openness, authenticity, and responsibility.

I have a keen interest in the personal, vocational, and social development of individuals as individuals or members of a group. I hold a bachelor's degree in counseling and have been a manager for over 30 years in community and education settings.

It is with the impulse to share this way of life that allows one to take care of oneself and welcome oneself with kindness, to realize one's power in order to find more and more freedom and joy that I contribute to the dissemination of Nonviolent Communication. I offer introductory NVC workshops and thematic workshops upon request, in addition to co-facilitating an NVC practice group. Gandhi's invitation to be the change one wants to see in the world is a continually renewed source of inspiration.

[FR] Contribuer au monde en tentant d’y apporter la compréhension, le respect et la paix que je souhaite y vivre et toucher au vivant pour goûter l’intensité qui s’y trouve, voilà les aspirations qui se sont révélées à moi lors de ma rencontre avec la CNV et l’apprentissage de sa pratique. Apportant sens et enlignement dans les différentes sphères de ma vie, c’est en effet à la fois comme maman et gestionnaire, mais aussi conjointe, sœur et amie que je goûte à l’impact d’entrer en relation au vivant en soi par l’auto-empathie pour mieux entrer en relation avec l’autre depuis un lieu d’ouverture, d’authenticité et de responsabilité.

Je nourris un grand intérêt pour le développement personnel, vocationnel et social des personnes comme individu ou membre d’un groupe. Je suis détentrice d’un baccalauréat en orientation et gestionnaire depuis plus de 30 ans en milieu communautaire et de l’éducation.

C’est avec l’élan de partager cet art de vivre qui permet de prendre soin de soi et de s’accueillir avec bienveillance, de prendre la mesure de son pouvoir afin de trouver de plus en plus de liberté et de joie que je contribue à la diffusion de la communication non violente. J’offre des formations d’initiations à la CNV et des formations thématiques sur demande en plus de co-animer un groupe de pratique en CNV. L’invitation de Gandhi à être le changement que l’on veut voir dans le monde est une source d’inspiration toujours renouvelée.

FROM THE ASSESSOR, Susanne Kraft

It is with great pleasure and relief that I celebrate Wendel's certification with you today: From the first time I met Wendel, I learned to appreciate the way she radically stood up for herself and at the same time for the wellbeing of the grou. Her clarity in structuring group processes, her great willingness to open her heart to the other side even in conflict.

Wendel was adopted from South Korea as a baby to the Netherlands and carries a heavy burden of early traumas. My heart was bleeding to see that she had to prove her competency much more than anyone else. At the same time, she was and is always willing to reflect and regret her own behavior and assets. When asked by our community to share about her experience with racism with the hope she could create connection and understanding, she painfully encountered our conditioning, "white fragility," - in our community as well. Honestly, for quite a while, I couldn't imagine her wanting to be part of "us" anymore.

During the years I was allowed to accompany her, she was an inspiration for me in living NVC: self-care, knowing and naming her boundaries and courageously making her requests, trusting that the other person can say no. As well as her honest interest in any other person - coupled with a deliciously fine sense of humor. With her I have experienced an integrity and humility that I have rarely seen embodied before. I am happy to have her character and her competence in our community and I am deeply grateful that she did not give up on us despite difficult obstacles and disappointments.

From Wendel:

When I signed up for my first Nonviolent Communication course, I hoped to learn how I could tell my husband in a nonviolent way that he was wrong and I was right. Of course this wasn't what I learned, but within the first few sessions a longing awakened for a life with deeper feelings and needs based connection to myself and others.  In addition I was determined not only to learn this way of living myself, but also to share this with others. 

I am grateful for everyone who accompanied me on the way - for the connection, tears and laughter and everything I learned (or by pointing out what there still is for me to learn). With a special mention of Yoram Mosenzon, who put trust in me when I couldn't experience this yet myself and Susanne Kraft, who stood by my side at all times through highs and lows.

FROM THE ASSESSOR, Susanne Kraft

[DE] Erstmal Empathie... ganz viel davon, so lange bis sie satt sind und fragen: was ist das, was Du da mit uns machst?" - so geht Sabine auf die Menschen zu. So ist sie Lehrerin gewesen - so hält sie jetzt ihre Seminare. Ich schätze an ihr, dass sie wirklich inneren Raum hat für ihr Gegenüber. Weil sie ihn auch erstmal für sich selber schafft.

[EN] First, empathy... lots of it, until they're satisfied and ask: what is it that you're doing with us?" - that's how Sabine approaches people. That's how she was as a teacher, and that's how she conducts her seminars now. What I value in her is that she truly holds inner space for the person she's with. Because she first creates that space for herself.

From Sabine:

[EN] “Do you love me?” Between contradiction and fascination, condemnation and a hesitant yes, this video by Marshall Rosenberg triggered an unexpected resonance in me. My curiosity was greater than fear, and finally, an old pattern emerged, namely questioning everything and not being able to leave anything behind as useful.

I wanted to learn this way of looking at the world, at relationships, and myself. In 2014, an intensive journey began with Thomas Stelling, who always believed in me and was always there in times when I thought I had lost faith in myself. Susanne Kraft, who saw my glow before I recognized it, who didn't give in in times of conflict, who always trusted me with her own humanity and thus lived on an equal footing.

An unconditional yes to what is. I'm finding more and more in this attitude, it gives me calmness in dealing with conflicts, enables me to act powerfully and to have a clear view of the possibilities I'm given.

My existence as a teacher at school changed almost unnoticed. I discovered freedom in a narrow system. Even in a narrow system, it is possible to be human and to act and communicate with dignity. After I wanted to throw everything away shortly before discovering the GRP, the flag turned. Not just conveying material but also having a lively experience in exchange, coming into contact, and experiencing content. What fun I had now being a teacher

My greatest concern is to make NVC available as a life resource for people who we would otherwise not find in our seminars. People who have less financial freedom, old people in the last phase of life, children and young people. Since I don't have to make a living through courses, I can live my vision of life. Contributing to peace by giving people this wonderful attitude and method from Marshall Rosenberg - simply because I can.

[DE] "Liebst du mich?" Zwischen Widerspruch und Faszination, Verurteilung und einem zögernden Ja, löste dieses Video von Marshall Rosenberg in mir eine unerwartete Resonanz aus. Meine Neugier war größer als die Angst und endlich einmal zeigte sich ein altes Muster, nämlich alles zu hinterfragen und nichts stehen lassen zu können, als dienlich.

Ich wollte diesen Blick auf die Welt, auf Beziehungen und auf mich selbst lernen. 2014 begann ein intensiver Weg mit Thomas Stelling, der immer an mich geglaubt hat und konstant da war in Zeiten als ich den Glauben an mich selbst verloren geglaubt habe. Susanne Kraft, die mein Leuchten gesehen hat bevor ich es erkannt habe, die nicht nachgegeben hat in konfliktreichen Zeiten, die sich mir immer wieder zugemutet hat mit ihrem eigenen Menschsein und damit Augenhöhe gelebt hat. 

Ein bedingungsloses Ja zu dem was ist. Immer mehr finde ich in diese Haltung, sie schenkt mir Gelassenheit im Umgang mit Konflikten, ermöglicht mir kraftvolles Handeln und einen klaren Blick auf meine mir gegebenen Möglichkeiten.

Fast unbemerkt veränderte sich mein Lehrerinnen Dasein in der Schule. Ich entdeckte die Freiheiten in einem engen System. Auch in einem engen System ist es möglich Mensch zu sein und würdevoll zu handeln und zu kommunizieren. Nachdem ich kurz vor Entdeckung der GFK alles hin schmeißen wollte drehte sich das Fähnchen. Keine reine Stoffvermittlung, sondern lebendige Erfahrung im Austausch, in Verbindung kommen, Inhalte erleben. Welchen Spaß hatte ich jetzt am Lehrerdasein

Mein größtes Anliegen, ist es die GFK als eine Lebensressource zur Verfügung zu stellen für Menschen, die wir sonst eher nicht in unseren Seminaren vorfinden. Menschen, die weniger finanziellen Freiraum zur Verfügung haben, alte Menschen im letzten Lebensabschnitt, Kinder und Jugendliche. Da ich meinen Lebensunterhalt nicht über Kurse bestreiten muss kann ich diese, meine Lebensvision leben.

Beitragen zum Frieden in dem ich diese wunderbare Haltung und Methode von Marshall Rosenberg den Menschen schenke - einfach so weil ich es kann.

from the assessor, Susanne Kraft

[EN] When Claudia asked me if I could be her assessor, my response was: IF you organize your candidates to meet as a group. And she did it. The assessment ceremony last weekend was the culmination of a journey that the candidates approached entirely process-oriented - right until the end. Each one rediscovered their "yes" within themselves once more and reaffirmed it in a very personal ritual.

Claudia had already conducted wonderfully structured trainings before, and during these years, she particularly confronted the issue: where am I perceived in a higher status - and what is needed there to reconnect from withdrawal?

[DE] Als Claudia mich gefragt hat, ob ich ihre Assessorin sein kann, war meine Antwort: WENN Du organisierst, dass ihr Kandidat*innen Euch als Gruppe trefft. Und sie hat es gemacht. Die Assessmentfeier am vorigen Wochenende war der Abschluss eines Wegs, den die Kandidat*innen ganz prozessorientiert gegangen sind - bis zum Schluss. Da hat jede noch mal ihr Ja in sich selbst gefunden und in einem ganz eigenen Ritual bekräftigt.

Claudia hat schon vorher wunderbar strukturierte Trainings gehalten und in diesen Jahren hat sie sich besonders dem Thema gestellt: wo werde ich im höheren Status wahrgenommen - und was braucht es da, um vom Rückzug wieder in Verbindung zu kommen?

from Claudia:

[EN]  I still remember the first time I met NVC. I was a board member at an alternative school, and I was looking for ways to deal with conflicts that served life. So I attended my first NVC seminar 15 years ago and it changed so many things in my life... Meeting people at eye level and from the heart always touches me deeply. During my first year of training, I found it difficult to return to my everyday life after each session. My longing for appreciative togetherness was great, and I experienced it in the seminars. And then gently, quietly, and quietly, I had this togetherness more and more in my everyday life and with the people around me.

That touched my heart on a very deep level, and so I decided 14 years ago to pass on what was so valuable to me to other people. I prefer to work with people who accompany children, parents, educators, and teachers and with people and institutions that have the same longing for internal and external (social) change. The spiritual aspect of NVC is important and valuable for me and my growth. I learned a lot from Robert Gonzales here and really appreciate the dyads.

I started the certification process two years ago, and I am very grateful that, with the support of Susanne Kraft, my assessor, I am even more deeply connected to the NVC attitude. Now I am excited to be part of the CNVC community and to share my love and enthusiasm for the NVC attitude with the people and to the places I am called.

[DE] Ich erinnere mich noch gut, wie ich der GFK das erste Mal begegnet bin. Ich war Vorstand an einer alternativen Schule und ich habe nach Wegen gesucht, Konflikte auf einer dem Leben dienenden Art und Weise zu begleiten. 

So habe ich dann vor 15 Jahren mein erstes GFK-Seminar besucht und es hat so vieles in meinem Leben verändert… Menschen auf Augenhöhe und von Herzen zu begegnen, berührt mich immer wieder zutiefst. Während meines ersten Jahrestrainings ist es mir schwergefallen, nach jeder Einheit in meinen Alltag zurückzukehren. Meine Sehnsucht nach einem wertschätzenden Miteinander war so groß und in den Seminaren habe ich es erlebt. Und dann sachte, still und leise hatte ich dieses Miteinander immer mehr in meinem Alltag und mit den Menschen in meinem Umfeld. 

Das hat mein Herz auf einer ganz tiefen Ebene berührt und so habe ich mich vor 14 Jahren entschieden, das, was für mich so wertvoll ist, an andere Menschen weiterzugeben. Am liebsten arbeite ich mit Menschen, die Kinder begleiten, Eltern, ErzieherInnen und LehrerInnen. Und mit Menschen und Einrichtungen, die die gleiche Sehnsucht - nach einem inneren und äußeren (Sozialen) Wandel - haben. Für mich und mein Wachstum ist der spirituelle Aspekt der GFK wichtig und wertvoll, hier habe ich viel von Robert Gonzales gelernt und schätze die Dyaden sehr.

Vor 2 Jahren habe ich mit dem Zertifizierungsprozess begonnen und ich bin sehr dankbar, dass ich durch die Begleitung von Susanne Kraft, meiner Assessorin, noch tiefer mit der Haltung der GFK verbunden bin.  Jetzt freue ich mich, Teil der CNVC-Gemeinschaft zu sein, und meine Liebe und Begeisterung für die Haltung der GFK mit den Menschen zu teilen und an die Orte zu bringen, zu denen ich gerufen werde.

from the assessor, Susanne Kraft

[EN] We just recalled the tremendous transformation Rosvita has undergone: I first met her armored in a skull shirt, combat boots, and spiked hair - her dog alongside her, muzzled. Yet within her was this incredibly soft, compassionate heart for all those disadvantaged in our society. Her willingness to have EVERYONE in sight and serve the greater good, all with a great sense of humor. Over the years, I've deeply admired her self-discipline, which supported this transformation. I'm grateful that Rosvita acts as a bridge to people who otherwise wouldn't have access to NVC because our language seems far too foreign to them.

[DE] gerade haben wir uns noch mal erinnert, welche große Wandlung Rosvita vollzogen hat: ich habe sie kennengelernt gepanzert mit Totenkopfhemd, Springerstiefeln und Stachelhaaren - neben ihr ihr Hund mit Maulkorb.Und innendrin dieses ganz weiche große Herz für alle die Benachteiligten in unserer Gesellschaft. Die Bereitschaft, ALLE im Blick zu haben und dem Ganzen zu dienen. Und das mit viel Humor. Über die Jahre habe ich ihre Selbstdisziplin , die diese Wandlung unterstützt hat, sehr bewundert. Und ich bin dankbar, dass Rosvita eine Brücke bildet zu Menschen, die sonst keinen Zugang zu GfK hätten, weil ihnen unsere Sprache viel zu fremd ist.

from Rosvita:

[EN] The moment NVC stumbled into my life, I was pretty desperate - I didn't want to live anymore so I wouldn't feel the shame, the exhaustion, the sadness that I felt because of the relationship with my daughter and also with My son had fallen apart quite a bit and was also accompanied by verbal and physical violence. That was my beginning because I survived the day a fist hit my nose and the evening with the bottle of vodka, and the new day promised an NVC seminar in Vienna in 3 months. If I'm still here, then I "have to." I want to change something, and you can only change yourself - they say.

I've watched every online video featuring Marshall Rosenberg x times. I absorbed everything I could find. I went to sleep with NVC and woke up with NVC exercises. I was particularly touched by the simplicity, clarity, and great compassion with which Marshal Rosenberg and others spoke, for example, about death, violence, and addiction in courses and interviews. And the children in the lyrics, the ones like mine, they seemed so angry and hard and vulnerable at the same time and I seemed so angry and hard and vulnerable at the same time.  So in the longing for security, loving-kindness, security, being supported, being able to sit with the pain in your heart and have trust in love and life. It lasted from October 18, 2014, to December 2023, and is still going on. Some things are still buried, they show up here and there, and I'm sure in the NVC. 

The phases experienced by...

• "I am responsible for how others are doing, especially my loved ones. And if the others are doing well, I am doing well. I do everything to make sure the others are doing well. I am important, and I am responsible for everything."
• "I'm not responsible for how you feel, and I don't care how you feel because you're responsible for it yourself, you just take care of yourself, I'll do it too" - which is only partly for the parents Child relationship works too.
• "I am not responsible for what you feel, AND I don't want to change what you feel or want, AND I care how you feel, AND I am responsible for what I say or do and how I act, and my actions have consequences."

I go through it again and again. My biggest learning...

Radical self-responsibility. Loving treatment of myself and my fears, "mistakes", "blundered opportunities", with the little plants - that are currently sprouting and want to go into the world full of joy. To get to know my capacity to feel and hold vulnerability, fear, sadness, joy, immeasurable joy. To be aware of my resources. To speak of myself: saying no and saying yes, knowing that it is a yes to my needs with these particular capacities of mine. To get help when I'm going around in circles and can't move forward.

I am grateful... All the teachers within the NVC challenged me and gave me empathy with all their might. Those who believed in me and noticed the "big heart" before me, the conflict partners: those who trusted me, and whom I trusted. My daughter for hitting me in the nose, my son for dancing, vacuuming, and the stove, and her coming back to me. My current husband for walking together, wrestling with each other, sitting, waiting, talking, hugging, the endless patience, the love. My parents, without them I wouldn't be here, with all the baggage full of effort and sacrifice, full of "you-"you-must", "you-should", "you-must-not", full of patriarchal or dominant cultural patterns Joy and liveliness of growing up in nature and curiosity for what is.

And to all the women and men who are desperate and don't know what to do right now, I have also experienced it in them, and my loneliness has become a togetherness, a diversity, and a community. Yes, I get desperate from time to time, and that's a good thing. Someone once said that faith moves mountains, meaning love. NVC means tuning into an attitude of love. The love for myself, for others, for the world, to live, to cultivate, and to be moves mountains. This is what I learned and experienced through the NVC, and this is what I need to pass on.

[DE] In dem Moment, wo GFK in mein Leben gestolpert ist, war ich ziemlich verzweifelt - ich wollte nicht mehr Leben, um die Scham, die Erschöpfung, die Trauer nicht zu spüren, die ich empfunden habe, weil die Beziehung mit meiner Tochter und auch mit meinem Sohn ziemlich auseinander gegangen war und auch von sprachlicher und physischer Gewalt begleitet war. Das war mein Anfang, denn ich habe den Tag an dem einen Faust meine Nase getroffen hat und den Abend mit der Flasche Wodka überlebt und der neue Tag hat ein GFK-Seminar in 3 Monaten in Wien in Aussicht gestellt. 

Wenn ich schon noch da bin, dann "muss ich", will ich etwas ändern und man kann ja nur sich selbst ändern - heißt es.Ich habe jedes Online-Video mit Marshall Rosenberg x-Mal angesehen. Alles, was ich finden konnte, habe ich in mich aufgesogen. Ich bin mit GFK schlafen gegangen und mit GFK-Übungen aufgewacht. Besonders berührt hat mich die Einfachheit, Klarheit und ganz viel Mitgefühl, mit der Marshal Rosenberg und andere zum Beispiel über den Tod, Gewalt und Sucht gesprochen hat in Kursen und Interviews. Und die Kinder in den Texten, die wie meine, sie schienen so wütend und hart und verletzlich zugleich und ich so wütend und hart und verletzlich zu gleich.

So in der Sehnsucht nach Geborgenheit, liebevoller Güte, Sicherheit, getragen sein, mit dem Schmerz im Herzen sitzen können und Vertrauen in die Liebe und das Leben haben. Es hat gedauert 18. Oktober 2014 bis heute Dezember 2023 und dauert immer noch manches ist noch verschüttet es zeigt sich hi und da, und ich bin sicher in der GFK. (das reimt sich sogar am Ende :)Die Phasen durchlebt von..." ich bin dafür verantwortlich wie es den anderen geht, besonders meinen Lieben. Und wenn es den anderen gut geht, geht es mir gut, ich tue alles damit es den anderen gut geht - ich bin wichtig, ich bin für alles verantwortlich" zu

"ich bin nicht verantwortlich für wie es dir geht und es ist mir egal wie es dir geht, weil ja du selbst dafür verantwortlich bist, sorge halt du selber für dich, ich mache das ja auch"  - was nur zum Teil für die Eltern-Kind- Beziehung funktioniert zu

"ich bin nicht verantwortlich für das was du fühlst UND ich will nicht ändern was du fühlst oder willst UND es interessiert mich wie es dir geht UND ich bin verantwortlich dafür was ich wie sage oder tue und mein Handeln hat Konsequenzen"Ich durchschreite ich immer wieder. .Mein größtes Lernen...

Radikale Selbstverantwortung. Liebevoller Umgang mit mir und meinen Ängsten, "Fehlern", "verpatzten Möglichkeiten", mit den kleinen Pflänzchen - das gerade sprießt und voller Freude in die Welt gehen möchte. Meine Kapazitäten kennen zu lernen, Verletzlichkeit, Angst, Trauer, Freude, unermessliche Freude zu empfinden und zu halten.  Mir meiner Ressourcen bewusst zu sein. Von mir zu sprechen: Nein-sagen und Ja-sagen im Bewusstsein, dass es ein Ja zu meinen Bedürfnissen mit diesen bestimmten meinen Kapazitäten gerade ist. Mir Hilfe zu holen, wenn ich mich im Kreis drehe und nicht mehr weiter komme in mir.

Dankbar bin ich... All den Lehrer: innen der GFK, die mich gefordert haben und mit aller Kraft Empathie geschenkt haben. Diejenigen, die an mich geglaubt haben und das "große Herz" schon vor mir bemerkt haben, den Konfliktpartner: innen, die sich mir zugemutet haben, denen ich mich zugemutet habe. Meiner Tochter, für den Schlag auf die Nase, meinem Sohn für das Tanzen, um das Staubsaugen und die Herdplatte und ihr zurückkommen zu mir. Meinem jetzigen Mann für das gemeinsame Gehen, miteinander ringen, sitzen, warten, reden, umarmen, die unendliche Geduld, die Liebe.

Meinen Eltern, ohne sie wäre ich nicht hier, mit all dem Gepäck voll Anstrengungen und Verzicht, voll "du-„du-musst", "du-sollst", "du darfst-nicht", voll der patriarchaler oder dominazkulturlicher Muster, voll Freude und Lebendigkeit in der Natur groß geworden zu sein und der Neugier für das was ist.Und all den Frauen und Männern, die verzweifelt sind und gerade nicht weiter wissen, auch in ihnen habe ich halt erfahren und meine Einsamkeit ist zu einer Zweisamkeit einer Vielsamkeit, einer Gemeinschaft geworden.

Ja, ich bin verzweifelt, von Zeit zu Zeit und das ist gut so.Der Glaube versetzt Berge hat einmal jemand gesagt und die Liebe gemeint. GFK bedeutet mich auf eine Haltung von Liebe einzuschwingen. Die Liebe zu mir, zu den anderen, zur Welt zu leben, zu kultivieren, zu sein und es versetzt Berge. Das habe ich durch die GFK erfahren und erlebt und das ist es, was mir am Herzen liegt, weiterzugeben.

from the assessor, Towe Widstrand

Nele is passionate about sharing nvc in her private and professional life, working with teachers to be. I have got to know Nele as ambitious, reliable and considerate. I wish for Nele to trust her ability to stay empathic and share NVC with clarity.

from Nele:

When I met NVC in 2016, I was struck by its simplicity (four building blocks, three core processes ... bringing everything "just" together on an A4 sheet), its wide applicability, and the realization that 'it all starts with me. I can contribute to this at any time (or not). In the years that followed, I enjoyed the depth, exploring new angles, and the inspiration of many trainers, as well as learning, living, and exploring together with other participants. The different NVC trainings I participated in and the certification process, in particular for me, contributed to:

• communicate in a life-enriching way for myself and others
• connect with the Energy of Needs within me and others
• connect with the Energy of self-compassion and self-love within me
• skill building in the empathic presence (by myself and others) as well as honest speaking, which I see as my contribution to a world with more peace, shared humanity, understanding
• to take responsibility for emotions that occur in every daily moment and to be aware “I always have the choice to respond to life-enriching
• embodying NVC consciousness
• protect the integrity of the NVC process

I feel thankful for the certification process and am eager to walk along this NVC path further. Knowing NVC, skill building in NVC, developing awareness, living, and sharing NVC have already supported me many times in contributing to cooperation and companionship at my workplace, as well as to connection and mutuality in my family, with colleagues, and with others. This makes me feel hopeful about making a difference in the world by contributing to more well-being at work, in my family, and especially in education.