"Whenever you have truth it must be given with love, or the message and the messenger will be rejected“ ~ Gandhi
What you will learn:
* How to listen and hear what is important to others, even when you don't agree with them.
* How to express what matters to you in a way that helps others hear you, especially when they don't agree.
* How to make clear requests and transition between listening and expressing to weave togetherness, even within divergence, and move the conversation forward.
* Participants will have the opportunity, through modeling and roleplaying, to apply this shift in consciousness to situations of interest, from the personal, interpersonal, and collective levels.
* The sessions will combine large and small groups. We will use whatever arises in the field to experiment with and implement both/and consciousness.
* Participants will receive slide presentation covered at the training.
Requested Financial Contribution: $400-$800
Creating a sliding scale supports our capacity to sustain our work and continue to serve. It also helps us include those without the financial resources to participate. Please consider contributing at the higher end of the scale and beyond, if you have the resources and willingness to do so.
While we make our request for support known, we invite you to choose an amount within your financial capacity, including below the minimum requested.
Some Details About our Location
Our host Toby lives in the country, just outside the town of Sebastopol equal distance from Petaluma and Santa Rosa.
LUNCH: There will be a 1 hour break for lunch from 1-2pm. For your convenience, it is encouraged that you bring your lunch with you as there are no close-by restaurants. You can, however, pick up something on your way in the morning at the Whole Foods which is within 10 minutes away by car.
ACCOMMODATIONS are readily available nearby. Additional information can be found on the registration form.
Toby lives with her 2 beautiful miniature Australian Shepherds. Emma and Tenzie. Emma is 17 years old and very gentle. Tenzie is young and energetic and very loving, and will settle down as soon as he knows all are welcomed visitors. Emma will quietly enjoy being with us during the training. Tenzie will come out and say hi during lunch.
Aya Caspi - Based in Northern California, Aya Caspi brings her unique blend of vision, practical clarity, and deep commitment to the transformative power of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) to settings as varied as schools, parenting, couples counseling, mediation, nonprofit organizations, social change communities, and media.Aya has served as an educational consultant on several preschool series, creating original curricula and advising on show development and scripting. Her client list includes Warner Bros., Discovery Media, 9 Story Media Group, Cartoon Saloon, Field Day Entertainment, the Cartoon Network, and HBO Max.
Aya has been sharing the work of NVC internationally via online classes and in-person retreats. She continually grapples with the joys and challenges of being raised in Israel and finds deep open hope in applying NVC to the context of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.
Find out more at https://www.cnvc.org/trainers/aya-caspi
Watch a 13-minute film about Aya’s work at Ghidotti Highschool: https://youtu.be/zWicevVTg8U
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Nora Heiber - As the Western Executive for the American Guild of Musical Artists since 1999, Nora has been intuitively searching for a way to combine compassion and kindness with power and influence as a way of creating a non-adversarial approach to negotiating collective bargaining agreements on behalf of performing artists of the opera and ballet. More recently, Nora has tried to integrate her growing knowledge of NVC into her work counseling pre-professional dancers and as a Master Trainer of the Gyrotonic Expansion System®. In 2015, Nora and her husband Cliff reached out to Aya Caspi for the purpose of deepening their practical knowledge of NVC beginning an ongoing partnership that has included several collaborative on-line and in-person workshops including at Nora and Cliff’s 20 acres property, Allsgood Farm in Penn Valley CA. In addition to NVC, Nora and Cliff have hosted a variety of workshops and personal retreats, including Permaculture Design, Nutrition, Dance, Gyrotonic and Yoga. Allsgood Farm is dedicated to creating a peaceful environment that is in accordance with natural laws in pursuit of conscious living.
Toby Ellen French has graciously offered to host this 3-Day NVC Training at her home out of her love for NVC, Aya and Nora. She is an artist, gardener and cook.
Toby also facilitates Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples, Families and Individuals, which is aligned closely with Nonviolent Communication. She brings 25 years of professional experience to her counseling practice. tobyellenfrench.com.
"Everything from the grounding quotes, from Rumi and Marshall and others to the actual healing process was like full course meal stretched over 5 weeks. I appreciate the many integration self empathy practices. I feel deeply touched to witness each weeks actual process and practice in real time with the helpful (PDF steps) The whole Reclaiming Holi-days experience each week is truly a treat to look forward. And reconnecting back to our natural innocence wisdom within and developing in that trust. - In the actual practice I felt support of the sacred space within our zoom group. And with connecting to the aliveness in the moment of my feelings and needs under the judging thoughts is healing process I value taking ownership of each own thoughts. The NVC - reclaiming processes helps awaken my awareness and further stretches my self empathy integration practice. I appreciate the depth of my own growth and learning in a safe sacred space."
"Aya’s leading of The Alchemy of Conflict Transformation series so clearly revealed to me the importance of caring for everyone’s needs when engaging in conflict situations, seeing that our liberation is inextricably interdependent. I especially appreciated Aya bringing both theory and practice into every session, by centering each class in the heart of NVC consciousness while walking us through the practical skills for engaging modern scenarios, including the personal and political challenges of our day. It’s been amazing to witness my relationships (including the one with myself) transform as I continue to practice what I’ve learned in the course. So much gratitude for Aya, Nora, and my classmates…"
~Jozelle Wong Yu
"Even after studying NVC for 8 years in a very deep way, I found a rich newness and inspiration from taking part in Aya's 'Reclaiming Wholeness' series. The language and processes she offers are incredibly rich, simple, and aligned with the spirit of NVC. The flow was logical, directed, and interconnected. And the words resonate at a deep level, painting a beautiful and complete portrait of NVC. I felt moved and impacted by this workshop."
~Matthew Malecha, CNVC certification candiate
"Aya Caspi’s courses are about so much more than skillful communication. The approach is to distill our message down to its core truth, which is based on the most innocent and basic needs that are tied to our very survival as humans. Reclaiming Wholeness brought me through the process of peeling back the layers of thought, created by social expectation and other external forces, that tend to blind me to my own humanity. I left each class uplifted and in a state of clarity. I felt a deeper appreciation for myself and the rest of the world, as opposed to shame about my “flawed” thinking. Once in touch with my higher intentions, the right words flow naturally. I so looked forward to each session. These classes have inspired me to make NVC an ongoing practice."
"I so much appreciate Aya's service, which helps me to continue to grow. I thought the series was gracefully executed and was very rich with the examples that were brought forward by the group. I feel hopeful witnessing so many sincere, courageous people. I enjoyed the focus on the spiritual aspects of NVC as it seemed to tap into the most essential part. The depth of Aya's integration of the NVC consciousness continues to impress me and it shines through her in even the smallest interaction. It's not easy for me to speak up in a group that size, but it was somewhat easier in the smaller breakout groups and I will continue to stretch myself towards more participation. I really liked having the option to listen to the classes again on the recordings."
~Andrea Nila Negron
Aya has led me to go through a journey from suffering to self-love and loving others. She leads life to a status of innocence and beauty."
~Yumi - China"I am grateful for both the depth and simplicity of the two day NVC intensive. It was a unique opportunity to explore deeper layers of healing and empathy individually and collectively. The real-life labs helped me to witness the interconnectedness of our challenges, vulnerabilities as well as longings. I found the steps in transforming judgments to deeper needs a handy tool to remember and use an ongoing basis. It was a poetic movement of intentions and a spiral of resonant loveliness. Deeply grateful,"
~Monica Espinoza, CNVC Certification Candidate
"I recently attended a NVC workshop with Aya in Southern California. I was particularly impressed with Aya’s ability to listen and sensing and for holding space for all participants with an open heart. Her guidance through the process of understanding the NVC concepts are gentle and compassionate, emphasizing that we are all spiritual beings longing for connection and belonging and that all of our needs matter. I feel inspired to continue the journey of inner and outer balance and I thank Aya for her guidance."
"When I embarked on this journey of working with Aya a few years ago, I was in a great deal of emotional pain and desperately looking for some tools to help alleviate it. I had no idea that my work with her would come to have life transforming ~and spiritual properties. Reflecting on my life prior to working with her, I am amazed at the completely different person which has emerged...Through patience, love, and artful reflection, Aya helped me dig through layers of anger and resentment which obscured my true and deeper longings...On a practical level, this awareness often leads to a greater fulfillment of my needs ultimately, because I am more able to accurately identify my true feelings and make requests from this more connected place. My relationships now are more meaningful and authentic. I see life now as an opportunity to grow and deepen connections with others. The love, support, and presence I have received from working with Aya has been a gift. I will forever be grateful for the contribution Aya has made to my family, to myself, and to the world at large."
"Aya's teaching refreshes and confirms my commitment to NVC which began in 1996. I feel inspired and joyful when I experience the depth she goes to and the way she brings this depth alive in the course of a class. Even having so much more experience (sometimes in Life, sometimes in NVC) than the folks with whom I did small group sharing, I loved the connection and gained support and help with some significant issues in my life."
Selene Aitken, CNVC certified trainer
"Going into the retreat, I had no idea the depth of healing and insight I would receive. Aya is truly a gifted teacher and a master of holding space, and I am honored and blessed to have learned so much from her. Aya takes NVC to the next level; I would definitely recommend her retreats or coaching to anyone!"
"Aya pulls in such a wide range of experience, background, and knowledge and always with such grace and passion that it is absolutely infectious. As far back as I can remember I have had trouble simply getting along with the majority of people I would interact with…I would also constantly find myself engaged and enraged in situations at work, school, and with my loved ones that would leave me unemployed, dropping out of school and pretty much alone… I was showered with a sense of community and openness that I have never experienced before. Multiple times a day Aya would find a way to show up with me in a personal and confidential way to check in with me and and track my processing, emotional state and general understanding of the topics and sessions of the day. I have never in my life felt such a present and loving person in each and every interaction I had and continue to have with her. I am struggling to find words to emphasize what I got out of this…my communication, my ability to empathize, my ability and willingness to consider other peoples feelings and needs, my willingness to be open and vulnerable, etc have already changed my life in a number of ways. I have already signed multiple new contracts for my company, starting to heal multiple damaged relationships, and all of my interactions from a rental car person to a bus driver or a customer support person on the phone are now not only friendlier but actually rich and enjoyable…my overall happiness and excitement about life and my journey in this life is forever enhanced."
"I was very inspired by Aya Caspi's generosity of time and energy. Aya ate all her meals with us, played with us on rest day, changed schedule and material to meet requests throughout the week. She was able to calmly hold the space for beginners and experienced alike to take the next steps. I would recommend Aya Caspi as an instructor to beginners and more experienced practitioners alike because of her ability to break down and teach the material, but also her kind and understanding demeanor. She held each person with care on their path at their own speed, with great understanding of the pain and joy of discovering a new way. Aya offers a deep teaching and uses great discernment in addressing misconceptions of beginners, while offering everyone a powerful example of lived NVC."
~Karen Martinsen, CNVC Certification Candidate
"Aya is a tremendously skilled teacher. Her abilities as a mediator and communication facilitator are unparalleled. The fearlessness, but also care, with which she faces difficult conversations is awe inspiring. She has a true gift, but one that is borne of real and deep work. ..Aya guides participants with a combination of teachings and real life practice, offering students opportunities to implement concrete changes in their way of communicating. Aya always practices the utmost care and respect for participants, but at the same time supportively challenges students to shift their thinking and communicating, and GROW. Aya's teachings have resulted in subtle shifts in my mindset which has had a profound impact on the way I communicate and interact with colleagues, family and friends. The class has helped me develop a very different understanding of "conflict," and has helped me find a path to empathizing and supporting others, while still caring for my own needs. I feel extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to work with Aya."
"I found Aya's course in Nonviolent Communication is a journey in reclaiming my voice. Once I was introduced to the basic core of NVC, observation, feelings, needs, request, I found I was able to slowly participate in any conversation. This has not been the case for most of my life. The once a week meetings held time to practice our own unique style of NVC, support each others unique style of NVC, and Aya', keen translation of our unique style of NVC always is full of opening up further insight into communicating with the most likely hood of positive results. Bonus, and I have acquired a new group of allies and support. Spreading the NVC word."
"Each session brought examples of Aya’s ability to be genuine, open and authentic, in both her celebrations and in some mournings. She is very attuned to the needs of individuals within the group, and is able to track who needs attention with apparent ease. Her ability to reflect what has been said and to "cut to the chase” with accuracy and precision and curiosity helped me to improve my own ability to sense and guess at what needs were under the pain or the celebration. She had participants from the USA as well as Canada and Germany. The sense of community Aya was able to create, maintain and encourage in these 8 sessions was remarkable."
~Hope Moffatt, CNVC Certified Trainer, Canada
"... Aya is a truly gifted NVC trainer and is an excellent facilitator. She is always prepared with a topic and is very skilled at keeping us on track and is good at walking us through scenarios that relate to the topic she has set. She is also great at incorporating into the discussion whatever spontaneously comes up... I find that the more I engage and practice with Aya, the greater chance that, even under pressure, my first response is one that grows from an NVC consciousness. If you are interested in expanding your knowledge of NVC, I urge you to consider signing up too."
"NVC with Aya is an eye opening, life-redefining experience. I learnt practical tools to communicate with others in a truly connecting manner, while developing a new sense of self (through self empathy and reclaiming innocence). It was wonderful to be able to share compassion during those unprecedented isolating times. I'm always amazed at how easy it becomes to connect with total strangers through the power of NVC. I (re)discovered the power of empathy, how we are interconnected and how behind every action, every word we say, there is a need we are trying to care for. Aya delivers a message of peace and teaches how to put it in practice."
"Thank you Aya, for holding the spirituality of NVC. Along with tools offered through classes, I received your alive presence. Your passion and devotion (that is very contagious) allowed the presence for all participants in vulnerability and trust. Consequently my vulnerability and trust continued being with me in everyday life, and Magic of world showed its new face. We see each other, only are still clumsy in expressing and sharing it. NVC holds our hand and teaches how to show that we see, how to acknowledge that we seen. I can be vulnerable, it’s empowering!"
"I have worked closely with Aya over the past year on several preschool shows for HBO Max and Cartoonito. The overall learning philosophy for our preschool programming is called Human Centric Learning, and NVC inspired communication skills fit perfectly into this framework. Aya develops specific curriculum for our shows, and reviews scripts at every stage, to ensure that we meet our educational goals in age-appropriate ways. She works closely with writers and creators to craft storylines that entertain, inspire and educate our littlest viewers. She has made a huge impact on our children's programming offering by integrating NVC philosophy into several of our shows. Her innate understanding of both the audience and of storytelling makes her work with storytellers particularly valuable. Writers are not only inspired by how she deepens their narratives, but how in doing so, she's actually changing their own lives."
Senior Creative Executive Kids and Family Warner Bros, HBO Max and Cartoonito.
"I went to the Reclaiming Resilience workshops seeking a way to make sense of how I found myself feeling and behaving, to find a way to converse with myself, and to hopefully discover a way to reclaim my sense of being. I was trying to deal with a lot of anger, anxiety and unhappiness, and I had stopped understanding why I was responding to situations the way I was.
Now, thanks to you (and Manasi and the other participants in the workshops), I have a framework, a vocabulary, a set of practical actions, which help me understand myself and the world around me more clearly, and behave in a manner which (I like to hope) is more affirmative, less judgmental, more supportive of, and less painful for, both myself and those around me. I try to apply the principles and practice of NVC in my thoughts and conversations now, and it feels incredibly empowering to be able to engage with myself and the world from a place of strength and contentment.
I thank you with all my heart for the perspective that I have learnt from you, for your kindness and your honesty, and for doing all that you did in those workshops to teach us to live authentic lives."
"Aya's leadership is sharp and compassionate. I fell in love with how she responded to the questions. She is a teacher you could trust unconditionally. Her words and actions are manifestations of NVC consciousness. Her heart is as innocent as a child. I'm grateful and enjoying having a teacher like her."
"Aya showed me the way into the NVC spirituality. The more I learn, the wider my vision is, and the more grounded my heart is. I found the pure beauty in compassion and my heart has been nourished."
"I'm moved to have such high-quality companions during COVID and deep community connection and sense of belong. Lots of my awareness has been awakened and I'm supported by spiritual strength. Aya's rootedness has opened my eyes and made me trust in NVC and trust more my own choice about going on this path towards innocence, healing and compassion."
"It is such a gift for me to be alive at the same time as Aya Caspi so that I have the opportunity to have her as my teacher. Writing this, I have tears because what she offers in service has profoundly impacted me in these past two years. It is difficult for me to put into words how much it means to me. It's as if I was digging around in a pile of rocks and discovered a very precious gem, and I still can't believe my good luck and fortune."
~Andrea Nila Negron
"This class found me at the right time. My husband and I had been talking for months about how NVC fits into our spiritual lives, and I was yearning for guidance. For these five weeks, I was blessed to have Aya as that guide. Her exploration of vulnerability, in particular, has opened a new chapter in our lives. We are conscious, now, of deeper yearnings beneath our immediate "needs," and we find grace and surrender in those reaching, grasping feelings. We are blessed with a hundred thousand opportunities to be vulnerable, every day, and in so doing, to embody holiness. Thank you, Aya, for the opportunity to be vulnerable with you."
"Aya truly embodies the essence of NVC consciousness, seamlessly tending to the many needs of the group, and doing so with care and compassion. This course addressed many relevant topics, especially in today's climate, including power and privilege, and strategies from an NVC lens on how to dismantle some of the challenges that arise within this context. She doesn't shy away from harder topics and in fact courageously walks towards them with the faith that the tools she has learned through the many years of training will support her in navigating these difficult situations. This was my first class with her and it is useful to see this modeled. The NVC application process will require time for digesting, learning and unlearning of old patterns, but having a small group to work with and the printed material she sends to return to again and again gives me a good starting point to do this work. If you are wanting to take a deeper dive into doing this type of transformational and healing work within yourself and your communities, I highly suggest taking a course with Aya."
"Aya is a teacher who is vulnerable, authentic and caring. She invokes and demonstrates a world of velvety softness - and of deep veracity. In this world, she lives the example of a world where every desire, longing, and need in the group is upheld, cherished and protected. She provides this example both with vigilance and elegance - creating a vividly felt experience of how possible it is to sink into the deep peace in one’s heart (compassion [for self and the world]) that seems rare today...yet with her guidance, increasingly possible. One gravitates to her like a moth to a soft, strong, peaceful flame. The emotional environment she creates and maintains stands, finally, a potent reminder for all those fortunate enough to come into contact with her...of with how miraculous it really can be to be living a human experience in this world."
"The Alchemy of Conflict series is a wonderful way to increase your capacity to handle the high conflict areas in your life. The skills Aya teaches during this class are applicable to any conflict situation, whether it’s personal, professional, or political. Aya’s commitment to nonviolence is inspiring and she holds the class with a level of competency, compassion, and professionalism that makes the experience one that will expand the way you see high conflict situations and make you more confident in your ability to navigate them with kindness, strength, and integrity"
Kara Nance, CNVC Certification Candidate
"Aya’s ability to teach in such a heartfelt manner comes across so clearly. She embodies NVC as I have never seen any trainer do before, except for Marshall Rosenberg himself. She has embodied the teaching in a way that she can transmit the teachings with precision and care."
"Thank you for making a positive impact on my spiritual growth. I have just made a major life decision and the processes I have practiced in your classes have helped me resolve fears and other emotional obstacles so that I can make this move feeling free and deliberate and joyful about my choice. I also feel amazement and gratitude that I can let go of old habits, through the sometimes strenuous, but certainly simple process of reclaiming my innocence. That seems like a miracle, like an answer to a question I have been persistently been asking for many years."
"Every sentences Aya articulates is a natural manifestation of NVC consciousness. I’m full of admiration toward her."
~Maple - China
"I was inspired by the way Aya taught from the way of being she has that has integrated NVC so much into her being and her spirituality. Being invited to include the joy and pain of my spiritual aspect in what she was teaching, I felt much more eager to learn.. Aya showed Care for herself and celebration of her courage and effort. From that I felt more connection with her as another human and was reminded of the importance of celebrating my own courage in taking on challenges (which is easy for us in this society to forget to do). I admired her ability to show deep respect of students in checking if they felt complete with their process with her and respect for the needs for the whole in choosing at a certain point to not take more questions in order to go forward with offering teaching and opportunities for us to practice them in breakouts.
~"I appreciated the talks that Aya gave to introduce the concepts and exercises. I also gained a lot from the honest sharing by participants. The group exercises were very important to be able to see how the different processes can transform our way of approaching each other. I learned that I have tools to reconnect with my innocence inside and to trust the feelings in my body. I also overcame some of my fears about speaking honestly and sharing my experiences in front of people."
"Aya taught us, me, how to identify our feelings and our needs. And then we learned how to express ourselves to others. To recognize their feelings, their needs, and to respond to them. I brought all of this home with me…I stopped looking for solutions…a tremendous step for me and I carry it with me. How Aya managed to gain the respect and love of all of us from many places, many backgrounds, many ages and many walks of life is astounding. I truly have never met anyone as skilled as Aya in teaching so difficult a subject as NVC"
"Aya’s teaching is worth reviewing again and again. I’m touched deep in the heart and have regained freedom, choicefulness and strength."
~Lucy - China
'I feel enriched by the NVC workshop Aya led in January in the beautiful Robinson Gardens in Beverly Hills. I found this workshop to have an Immense Influence on the “collective I”: It was Intense, Intelligent, Informative, Insightful, Inspiring, Intimate. Aya instilled in me an insatiable interest in this incredible subject and its tools for better communication. I’m still basking in her NVC glow, hoping for a lasting effect. With warm gratitude,"