"When I married into an already made family of 5 children, ages 6-16, and their natural mother was not happy. Soon after 9/11/2001 I moved out, thinking that I just didn't want to live with people that would not have cared if I had been in one of those buildings that collapsed. Then, I read Marshall's book, and understood that if I had had the skills he talked about, things would have turned out differently. I would never have heard judgement, blame, or criticism, and I could have connected with each person in that family differently. I was hungry to learn NVC and use it, and went to every NVC training I could. I love that Marshall played the guitar, because I was trained as a music therapist and knew the power of music and the arts in bringing connection. When looking for a job, I realized that I was willing to work in a Maximum Security Psych. Hospital because with NVC I knew that I could contribute to healing by bringing connection.
During a group one of the participants became extremely angry. After a significant about of empathy, his expression changed and he blurted our, ""How come I feel like hugging the world?""
During another session, a participant was struggling with voices that were a nightmare to him. He began offering empathy to the voices, understanding their needs. After about a month he announced that he no longer heard voices, but heard music instead. About a year ago, when I left that facility the patients in my groups asked me to please continue sharing NVC with others so that they would not end up locked up in a psych facility like they were.
The amazing thing is that now I teach a class in the community college department chaired by the mother of my 5 step kids at her request.
Thank you, Marshall, you have offered me and so many others is a new more wonderful life."