Miki Kashtan

Language of Report: 
English
Year of Report: 
2009
Share My Report With: 
General Public (Including Certified Trainers and Certification Candidates)
B. Briefly list the groups and organizations you worked with this year as a trainer.: 
See section L for my (narrative) response to questions A and C. Whole number answers are not possible in this circumstance. Miki: None this year Inbal: Holy Family Day Home, San Francisco Others: Accrediting Commission for Schools, Western Accociation of Schools & Colleges Alameda Point Collaborative Alliance Medical Center Bay Midwifery Peer Group - Berkeley BayNVC trainers & Safer Communities Berkeley Patients Group - Staff Berkeley Student Coop Berkeley Unified School District - Network for a Healthy California Congregation Beth Am California College of the Arts California Institute of Integral Studies Casa de las Madres Celebrations of Love Chaplaincy Institute for Arts & Interfaith Ministries Conference on Engaging the Other: The Power of Compassion Downtown High School Edgewood Children's Center Fred Finch Centers Gateway Center School Holy Family Day Home Ida B Wells High School Wellness Center Jamestown Community Center Kaiser Permanente LoveJourney Marin College Mental Health Association Mission Learning Center Multiple Sclerosis Society, Northern California Chapter North Beach Homeless Drop in Center Northern California Presbyterian Homes & Services Other Avenue Food Coop Parents for Public Schools of San Francisco Pleasant Hill Cohousing Prison Law Office Progressive Jewish Alliance Project Avary Public Health Law & Policy, a project of the Public Health Institute Richmond College Prep Charter High School Samuel Merritt University San Francisco Mental Health Association San Francisco State University, Holistic Health Students San Mateo Dept of Special Education Santa Barbara College of Continuing Education Santa Rosa Junior College Senior CommUnity Care / PACE St Vincent De Paul Homeless Center Triple Point Cohousing UC Berkeley, Cal Corps, Public Service Center UC Berkeley, Metta Center UC Berkeley, Pacific School of Religion, PANA Institute for Leadership Development and Study of Pacific Asian North American Religion Women of Color Resource Center Total 52 organizations
D. What are you celebrating about your training experiences this year? What was significant for you? What touched your heart?: 
One thing I enjoyed this year was teaching a series that was focused on consciousness milestones rather than specific skills. Having a group that was relatively stable for the year was also a delight, because there was a shared sense of accompanying each other on a path, though not quite as strong as we have in our ongoing programs. The retreat in Poland was an astounding experience. I was so touched by the depth of hunger for knowledge and commitment to do the work that I experienced. Some of the women who attended came at great cost, which was part of what created the sense of magic and sacredness around the circle coming together. I also had a blast of a time with the leadership support team, and enjoyed the winter! 2009 is the year in which I started my monthly TV program, and I have enjoyed working on this project immensely. I was astonished to discover how much of a team effort it would be unlike the radio program which was essentially just me and one person to support me in some basic ways. I remain hopeful that this medium will increase over time and provide more exposure to NVC. This is also the year in which my work with the NVC Academy started taking off, with a sense of much activity and much interest. I have been relishing the fruits of Mary’s and Mark’s labor that allow me to reach people across the world from the comfort of my own home. Lastly, I started working on a book in 2009, and am continuing to do so this year. The series of workshops that I led (together with teleclasses I led and teleclasses that Arnina, my sister, led) provides the raw material (acknowledging Susan Livingston for her astonishing work of transcribing it all, and many other volunteers who are supporting me in this project). I don’t anticipate being done this year (2010), either, because there
E. Would you share some difficult experiences you had while training this year and how you handled them?: 
I don’t recall difficult training experiences this year. My challenges are not while training, almost invariably. I have sufficient access to self-connection, empathy, transparency, and support from others (not necessarily in this order) that it rarely happens that something becomes unmanageable.
F. How do you teach the spiritual basis of Nonviolent Communication in your workshops and training programs? : 
There is no change in my response. See previous years’ reports for the essentials. This past year I also addressed the spirituality of NVC directly in the series of workshops that are the basis of the book. The book is designed for people who have some kind of spiritual practice (including possibly an NVC practice), and I definitely enjoyed the freedom of talking about this directly and deeply.
G. Please describe your social change goals...: 
The following section about the dream is for BayNVC as a whole (written by Miki). Our vision at BayNVC is of a world where everyone needs matter and people have the skills for making peace. This would mean a world in which need awareness infuses every relationship, organization, and structure that exists in the world. I actually tend to believe that beyond a generally abstract level of description, it would not be possible for me or any of us to fully envision what the world could be like if interdependence and power sharing truly were common rather than the rare exception that they are today. That said, I have great ease in envisioning a money-less gift economy; restorative justice systems widely accessible to anyone for resolving conflicts; creativity in mobilizing, creating, and distributing resources to satisfy everyone’s fundamental physical needs; and a level of honesty, care, and inner resources that allows satisfying relationships as well as dialogue about differences to be commonly interwoven into the fabric of everyday life. The following section about our work is written in 2 parts. BayNVC (written by Miki): Writing this in March of 2010, the day after a town-hall meeting to address the crisis that BayNVC is facing, I am concluding that we haven’t yet managed to learn what it is we need to do to respond to the shrinking economy and systems collapse we experience. I continue to have a sense we are, indeed, “called to do entirely news things, way different from “teaching NVC” in workshops.” I don’t have a sense that we have collectively coalesced into what that would look like. I can speak for myself, I am attracted to two changes: • Applying our skills directly in communities and organizations (using our empathy, coaching, mediation, and facilitation skills), without necessarily even calling them NVC. This would allow, I believe, more effective possibilities for crossing class barriers (in both directions away from middle-class), race barriers, and political barriers. • Shifting the focus of our teaching from supporting individuals in having better lives, to supporting individuals in having skills to support their communities and environments. Miki: I don’t have anything to add personally beyond what I wrote above for BayNVC.
J. Please describe your efforts to create, or join, an NVC circle or organization.: 
The following section is written in 2 parts BayNVC (written by Miki): BayNVC has been in a period of immense transition since Kit announced her departure in January 2009 (she left at the end of May), and continuing into the time of writing (March 2010). The learning is still happening, and hard to summarize at this point. I can only say that I have immense gratitude and respect for all of us who are actively engaged in this process, for bringing our trust, love, and consciousness to bear on extremely challenging times, in terms of financial viability, in terms of direction for the organization, and in terms of leadership. Miki: Aside from my involvement with BayNVC, I had no other involvement in NVC circles in 2009.
K. Summarize participants’ evaluations, and how their feedback resulted in new learning or growth for you this past year.: 
Once again I haven’t had any meaningful feedback in 2009 that I can remember now that resulted in new learning for me. My learning and growth are not in teaching, but more in working within myself and with others. See below.
L. What are your current growing edges or challenges as a trainer that you will be working on in the future?: 
Towards the end of 2009 I gave birth to a new idea to address what continues to be my deepest inquiry about this work: how to support people in truly integrating NVC consciousness. I am satisfied with increasing my clarity about this, resulting in 2010 being a launching of non-training initiatives, such as the Consciousness Transformation Community.
M. If you found opportunities to work with other trainers this year, please share the most meaningful experiences for you.: 
There is nothing meaningful to share in this area for me.
N. Is there anything else you would enjoy sharing with the CNVC network?: 
In this section, I answer questions A and C with narrative replies, as whole-number responses are not possible in my case. 1. QUESTION A (# of training days) ______________________________________________________________________________ This report is a hybrid between reporting on BayNVC as an organization and reporting on my personal activities. Inbal is currently facing treatment for cancer, and is not currently finding a way to prioritize this report. Our work continues to be intertwined with the activities of many other people within BayNVC, and BayNVC continues to have meaning and contribution that we want to include in this report even if they are not directly about our personal activities, because this organization is itself part of the unfolding dream that we carry of contributing to the transformation we long for. For BayNVC: 2009 marks a major transition for BayNVC that is still ongoing: Kit Miller, who was our director for 5 years, left at the end of May 2009. We have not identified a replacement for her, and have only an interim director for now. Stay tuned for a year to know what happened… For Miki: Also, towards the end of 2009 Inbal was, once again, diagnosed with cancer. This has had a profound effect on me in a variety of ways: her stepping down from being involved with the work; the intensity of involvement with supporting her; the shift in my support network, of which she was a core part; and the emotional experience of having this happen. At the time of writing this report Inbal is still actively engaged with a primary focus on her health and well-being. As 2009 started, I was planning to focus primarily on writing a book and some teaching. As the year progressed, I became involved in the search process to replace Kit; in fundraising activities for BayNVC; and later in supporting Inbal. My entire year changed dramatically because of these two major events. a. Approximately how many training days did you have this year?: (Please enter only a whole number representing the approximate number of days of training you provided, so we can calculate the total number of training days provided by the people creating these reports. NOTE: For this purpose, a half day is 2 to 4 hours. A full day is 5-8 hours.) BayNVC as a whole offered about 609 days or partial days of training in 2009, the equivalent of about 330 full days of training. We sustained this with the support of 24 trainers other than Inbal and myself, 7 of them certified trainers from other parts of the world. Most of the trainers we have worked with, including certified trainers, are graduates of the BayNVC Leadership Program Inbal and I co-founded in 2002. Over the course of the year Inbal shared NVC for 48 days, the equivalent of 31 full days. I shared NVC for 105 days, the equivalent of 78 full days. The above numbers do not include practice groups offered in the San Francisco Bay Area by BayNVC trainers, which likely amount to an additional 50 days overall. The table below summarizes the variety of events we offered in 2009. The extent to which BayNVC has grown beyond our own activities is clearly visible in this table. (Numbers below correspond to Inbal - Miki - John Kinyon - Out-of-Area Certified Trainers - Others) INTRODUCTIONS (including 5 introductions to parents) 0-0-0-0-31 PRIVATE EVENTS (Groups and organizations) 1-0-0-3-70 SERIES (anywhere from 3 to 12 weeks long, mostly 8 or 12 weeks) 0-0-5-0-33 WORKSHOPS 2-19-4-5-5 ONGOING PROGRAMS (see below) 1-0-1-1-1 TELECLASSES 0-39-0-0-0 Conflict Hotline Live TV Show 0-10-0-0-1 NVC Clinic for Therapists 0-0-0-0-5 RETREATS (various formats and locations, including CA, US East Coast, Poland) 0-3-3-0-1 OUT OF AREA WORKSHOPS (in Spain, Switzerland, and Israel) 0-3-0-0-0 MISCELLANEOUS 0-2-0-0-2 Grand Totals 4-76-13-9-149 Our ongoing programs focus primarily on leadership development, and to a lesser extent on deepening skills for personal growth. Leadership Development is one of BayNVC’s strategic directions, both in terms of training new generations of people capable of sharing NVC with others, and in terms of supporting existing leaders in the world to have more capacity for power-sharing and collaborative leadership. We are also hosting the Mediation Program for Ike Lasater and John Kinyon, another option for people to immerse themselves deeply in NVC skills with a unique focus. PLEASE NOTE: any events we hosted that were led by other certified trainers are likely to also show up in their reports. It is beyond our technical ability to separate this out. 2. QUESTION C (# of people trained) ______________________________________________________________________________ It is impossible to have an actual number. We track everyone who registers for our events, and estimate the number of people who attend organizational trainings. However, we have no easy way of avoiding counting people twice. On the other hand we don’t track people who come to practice groups, and so these two errors may cancel each other out. This year we are also counting the people who attendee NVC Academy teleclasses with Miki (didn’t do before; it wasn’t such a significant number), and again we have no way of cross-checking duplication. Lastly, we are estimating how many people are watching the Conflict Hotline based on youtube hits. Inbal: 183 Miki: 2557 Others: 3198 Total: 5938 These numbers do not include the people who are reached through other media.
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