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Jeff teaches Nonviolent Communication (NVC) at university in Tokyo, Japan
On Thursday, I gave a 1 hour, 45 minute lecture to students at the International Christian University (ICU) in Tokyo. I was invited by Professori Mori, who teaches a class on international relations.
Hideayaki and Haruno, two of my Japanese friends, made this connection with ICU, and I am grateful.
(photo taken by Ken Anno-- thank you, Ken)
preparation for the lecture, I reminded myself of something very useful
I learned from Miki Kashtan a couple of year ago -- that people who
attend an introduction to NVC are not necessarily interested in, or
committed to, learning the skill sets of NVC (e.g. Observation,
Feeling, Need and Request).
And I have found this to be
especially true for groups -- such as this university class -- who do
not deliberately choose to attend a training, but instead it is
selected for them. The most extreme case of this is when I have been
invited to give a training at a workplace, and the employees are
"required" to attend -- this often creates an attitude of resentment
and resistance even before I arrive, which I then am faced with once I
In this class, obviously, the students had some
degree of "buy-in" because they voluntarily signed up for the course as
a whole. And to my extreme delight, my needs for receptivity and
partnership and inspiration were very, very deeply satisfied.
students, while they did not speak very much, seemed very engaged, and
I sensed this based on their eye contact, facial expressions and
nonverbal communication, including whenever I asked them to do
something, they all agreed (which met my need for trust).
the start, one of my favorite places to share NVC is in a university
setting, which strikes me as somewhat odd -- even to myself -- because
sometimes the institutional structure of universities sometimes makes
it harder to establish heart connection.