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Nonviolent Communication And Radical Self-honesty Make A Good Pair

If you are into Nonviolent Communication, there's a good chance you're aware that it entails observe, state your thoughts, state your feelings, state your needs, and state the positive results that will ensue from your needs being met.

This goes hand-in-hand with Radical Self-Honesty which is based on truthful observations, thoughts, feelings, needs, and positive results.

Before we continue, I think it is a good idea to define a few terms:

  • Truth is a meaningful set of binary propositions that actually did happen or are happening in the present moment.
  • Falsehood is a meaningful (plausible) set of binary propositions that could actually happen but are not actually happening or never did happen.
  • Nonsense is a set of meaningless propositions that could never happen.
  • Probability is a set of meaningful propositions that could actually happen but haven't happened yet.
  • Delusion is rapid, instinctive and nonreflective thinking. It is not based on thinking things carefully but on snap judgments.
  • Judgments/opinions are thoughts laced with emotional states based on a mixture of truth, falsehood, nonsense (sometimes) and probabilities.

For instance, 

If I say Oge is my name, that's the truth.

If I say I lived in Ekiti state, that's false.

If I say all cats fly at night, that's nonsense.

If I say I could die tomorrow, that's a probability.

If I say my ego will dissolve when I die, that's a judgment/opinion.

In a bid to practice radical self-honesty, a human being is required to admit to herself that the self (who she is on the inside) has been formed on a mixture of truth, falsehood, nonsense, probabilities, and judgments.

A human being is regarded as realistic when she is tilting towards forming herself based on only the truth and expresses increasingly true cognitive (thinking) processes and affective (feelings/emotions/mood) states.

I am of the opinion that Nonviolent Communication best happens when you heal your psyche from the inside.  I practice healing of my psyche with Nonviolent Communication when I change my self-talk to the language of NVC i.e observe, state thoughts, state feelings, state needs, state positive results that ensue based on self-talk based on only the truth (radical self-honesty).

This behoves on me to sharpen my powers of discernment of my thoughts and feelings so I can distinguish between truth, falsehood, nonsense, probabilities, delusional thinking, and opinions/judgments. 

I have found changing my self-talk to the language of NVC based on radical self-honesty much easier by listening to Gamma 40Hz Binaural Beats and Delta 0.5Hz Binaural Beats on YouTube as I recite positive affirmations based on the language of NVC interlaced with radical self-honesty.

In a scientific article published in April 2017 by National Institutes of Health, US National Library of Medicine, Binaural beats have been shown to impact information processing via their putative role in increasing neural synchronization.

Some people, myself inclusive, have found that Gamma 40Hz Binaural Beats is similar to a brainwave frequency found in expert meditators who have been practising meditation for years.  Delta Binaural Beats are claimed to help one access the subconscious mind, and I am very particular about NVC entering into my psyche instead of my cramming it into my working memory, my conscious mind but my subconscious mind being unable to internalize the teachings of Nonviolent Communication.

I think the points in this blog post will be especially useful for people who struggle with Nonviolent Communication as I'm of the opinion their problems stem from the psyche which is yet to be healed via using NVC.

I also think that a failure to heal the psyche via Nonviolent Communication will lead to a rigid clinging to the outward forms of NVC but no real change in an individual's interpersonal interactions.

I have found Nonviolent Communication to be practical spirituality i.e it gives my life a deep sense of meaning and it helps me navigate the social world as I get my needs met in a manner that is regarded as mutually beneficial to whomever I interact.

I am on a journey with Nonviolent Communication and it only gets better.

I hope it helps you too!

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